Another Brick in the Wall

Who knew that my most frequent swim partner would be - a brick? Yep - Aaron was at it again this week with the bricks. As in all well structured classes, we get to build on the lessons of the past. So we repeat an old favorite: we pair up and Aaron tosses two brick into the deep part of the pool and side by side, we go fetch. And we get to do the drill twice because - actually, I don't know why we get to do it twice - maybe "two" is Aaron's lucky number?

Dodie and I are the couple of the moment, so we go do as we are bid and fetch the bricks off the bottom of the pool, flip over on our backs and otter them back to our Master. He promptly flings them out again and gives the command. This time, though, I have an idea to goof on him a little. I am wearing the sparkly red shoes, so I tap my heels together three times - oops - wrong fairy story. I am wearing the red zoomies, so I feel strong, like Aquaman. I convince Dodie to let me get both bricks, to see if Coach notices. I am not totally sure I can do this, so we concoct a back up plan - if I can't handle both bricks, I will drop one and Dodie will casually go down after it and bail me out.

I easily go down to the bottom and pick up both bricks, one in each hand. But it's not so easy getting back to the surface. I have to get both legs on the bottom and shove before I get enough momentum to surface. Once there, I roll to my back, and let the zoomies do their thing. Still, it's tougher than I thought - even with the flippers I have to kick hard and concentrate on keeping my head back and chin up to keep from going under. When I get to the end of the pool, I hand the two bricks up to coach, one in each hand. He says's, "That's great! From now on, I'm going to duct tape them together and you can do it that way all the time!" Ooops.

By the way, since my second run has used up all the time alloted for this drill, Dodie gets a free pass and doesn't have to do her second fetch, so she thinks this has been a fine stunt all the way around.

Keeping Our Heads Above Water
Turns out we are not done with the bricks yet. Coach had devised new torture.

Every week we tread water, first using just our arms - I feel like a big buzzard flapping my wings during this stage - then using just our legs. We repeat these cycles, 20 seconds for each stage, until we complete three minutes.

Sometimes during the arms only part, I cross my legs at the ankles, to make sure I don't use my legs, and also because it feels feel pretty awkward with them just hanging out there. Coach sees this and thinks it's a good idea, and asks Mike and Dodie and Kelly to do the same, which they do. When it's time to switch back to the legs part, Kelly, who has been quietly giggling over in her corner of the pool, says, "Coach, can I uncross my legs now?" Like this drill wasn't tough enough for me without a lung full of water?

Anyway, after "fetch", Coach takes us and the bricks down to the deep part of the pool and tells us we are going to tread water again - with the bricks. Being the nice guy he is, he gives us two (there's that number again) choices. We can hold the brick out of the water with two hands and use just our legs. Or we can hold the brick with one hand, and use the other arm to help keep us afloat. Being Coach, there is a catch - if we hold the brick in just one hand, we have to extend our arm until it is totally straight up in the air. We are going to do this drill - wait for it - twice.

Kelly goes first. She grabs the brick in both hands, starts to kick and immediately begins to sink. This is not a surprise, since she has no fat to help with buoyancy, and the brick is about 20% of her body weight. Coach mentions that last week she only lasted 6 seconds, and is astounded when she is still going after 30. Of course, her head is totally under water and she is not breathing. She later tells us all that she has taken a deep breath as soon as she grabbed the brick, because she was bound and determined to break her record and who needs air anyway? No competitive drive there.

We all take our turns in round one, and we all use two hands. This is a hard drill for Mike, because two weeks ago, Aliens landed on his knee and then drilled for oil. I know this because he has three very neat little equi-distant craters atop his knee cap, and a scar in the middle of it. I've seen enough episodes of the X-Files to know what causes marks like that!

In round 2, we all decide to use only one arm for the brick. Dodie does great - she has very strong legs and is a powerful kicker. She has that brick so far out of the water I think she is trying to touch the ceiling with it. And then, just to show off, she changes arms, without losing a stroke. Next thing I know, she uses her free hand to grab the other brick, and starts pumping the bricks up and down like they are pom-poms. Wow - I guess once you're a cheerleader, you're always a cheerleader!

I can hardly wait until the next class to find out what other perverse things Coach has in store for us and the bricks.